It's been a long time since I have put my thoughts to paper... and I have to admit, I have missed it. The sensation of writing for pleasure, to sit and think not of business formulas, but rather how to best pick and choose my words to construct the intangible into some form of readable reality. It's such a relief to be able to find an outlet for my thoughts, to set their digital footprints down into a semblance of permanence, evidence of where my wandering mind has tread.

It's time to start afresh. I miss writing- writing as an expression of the person that I am, not who I was before, not who I will be in the future, but my present self. I realize that I get so caught up with the past and the future that I never take time to live and breathe today- I worry so much about all my perceived flaws, that I forget that the architect of myself, my sense of identity, lies not in the eyes or tongues of others, but rather me.

I was just watching my old video of the 10th Anniversary Concert of the Les Miserables musical this afternoon, and I was struck by the sudden revelation that if you gave me enough musicals, beautiful art and books, I would be content to bury myself in them forever even if I were shut off from the world. I don't know what it is in art (in any medium) that can awake such passion and excitement in me. Even in the past, when my friends squealed over the pretty Backstreet boys, I was already enraptured by words and song, beauties that have no faces. Dickens, Lawrence, Michael Ball, Stevensen, Atwood, Huxley, Weber, Brightman... art that expresses itself in so many different forms, touching people without borders and for generations.

I love musicals. They are scripts woven into song and dance. I admire the actors and actresses who have made it to West End or Broadway, who have beautiful pure vocals that soar so effortlessly up and expressions that can evoke emotions in even the most hardened viewer. The orchestra, the script, the songs, the costumes, the props... everything all just comes together in one big bang.

I love books. It always takes my breath away the way a talented writer can make black blobs on a monotonous page a colourful reality. Be it in autobiographies, literary classics, and even graphic novels-

It's so beautiful.

And it's all a facade 2:22 AM!